Question: What is the season, out-of-state license fee, and bag limit on ex-wives in the state of New Hampshire?
Answer: The traditional season is in autumn, after the leaves have fallen. The lack of foliage makes them easier to spot. License fees are usually minimal, and the limit is one ex-wife per day (although Mormons are allowed up to three).
Let us follow the brave hunter into the forest, to witness this exciting sport. He quietly creeps up to a tree, which looks out on a clearing. He positions himself behind the tree, quiets his breathing, and gently pulls out the ex-wife call. He blows into it; the sound of "alimony! alimony!" echos through the woods. There! What was that? A rustling from the bushes a ways down. He sees some sparkles of light and figures it may be another hunter, so he holds his fire. But now the creature steps out of the cover and he can see that the sparkling is the diamonds given to the ungrateful biotch months before by her husband. He aims and prepares to fire... but holds, as he sees she is not alone. There are large, shambling forms accompanying her- lawyers! It is not unexpected for an ex-wife in the wild to be surrounded by one or more of these parasites, but it is always a surprise to see them. He aims again and fires! Rats, hit a lawyer. That's ok though, it's always open season on lawyers and there's no limit. But now the others are scattering. BLAM- He quickly fires again and this time hits the target! Now that he has killed the ex-wife what will he do with it? Many men quickly stuff and mount their kills, but trust me stuffing and mounting is much more fun with a live woman.
-------------------- "Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."