Cafeoutdoors.com: Men are just happier people

What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stay put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear NO shirt to the waterpark.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one in just too icky.
Same work, more pay.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to trun a nut on a bolt.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress - $5000. Tux rental - $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
One mood, all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five day vacation requires one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear if $8.95/3 pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face & neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet & one pair of shoes - one colour all season.
You can wear shorts, no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th, in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier!