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Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes
      #45065 - 06/21/06 04:03 AM

Being the classless bastards that we are.......

It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg

Personally, I think it's prosthetic.

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #45066 - 06/21/06 04:05 AM

News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his wife Heather Mills-McCartney.

Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She said in an earlier briefing, "I have no idea why this has happened, I'm stumped"

"She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk out on a relationship like this"

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #45068 - 06/21/06 04:06 AM

A poem by Sir Paul McCartney-

I lay upon a grassy bank
My hands were all a quiver
I slowly removed her suspender belt
and her leg fell in the river

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #45069 - 06/21/06 04:07 AM

These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please.
Now she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another lady that can fill her shoe.

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Mel
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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #45136 - 06/21/06 01:58 PM

You are just bad to the bone.

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: Mel]
      #45152 - 06/21/06 02:57 PM

I thought for sure her name was Eileen though...

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: IIFID]
      #45153 - 06/21/06 03:09 PM

She has probably gotten used to a life of luxury with Paul. She better hop to it and find herself another rich squeeze!

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: IIFID]
      #45591 - 06/26/06 12:44 AM

A journalist interviews Sir Paul McCartney:"So, Sir Paul, do you think that you will ever go down on one knee again?"

Sir Paul: "I'd prefer it if you called her Heather".

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #57869 - 09/13/06 04:04 AM

A South African gold miner loses his leg in a mining accident and is in hospital talking to his mate.

"Well now I'm ***ked, who on earth's going to want a one legged gold digger?"

His mate replies "Well, you could try Paul McCartney"

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #151158 - 05/31/08 12:08 AM

Doing the math on the Paul McCartney-Heather Mills divorce.

After 5 years of marriage, he payed her $49 million. Plus, whatever he spent on her while he was married to her!

Assuming he banged her every night during their 5 year relationship (and having been married, we all know THAT doesn't happen), it ends up costing him $26,849 per boinking, not counting attorney's fees, court costs and the incidental costs of being married to her.

On the other hand, Elliot Spitzer's call girl Kristen charges $4,000 an hour.

And that's Crazy, right?

But... get this!

Had Paul McCartney employed Kristen for 5 years, he would've paid $7.3 million for an hour of sex every night for 5 years (a savings of more than $41 million). PLUS!!!

Value-added benefits are:

A HOT 22 year old babe, no begging, no coaxing, never a headache, wide open menu, ability to put BOTH legs around you, no bitching or complaining and NO 'to do' lists.

Best of all, she leaves when you're done, and comes back the next day, ready for another round. All at 1/7th the cost, with no legal fees.* *

NOW, Is it just me, or is this the kind of math qwiz they should be teaching in all our schools?

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: SwampFox]
      #151213 - 05/31/08 08:01 PM

I was suprised to hear she got anything cause she didn't have a leg ta stand on!

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Re: Paul McCartney Divorce Jokes [Re: Hop]
      #151259 - 06/01/08 01:21 PM

tough to get a leg up on you guys.
Poor old Paul is just sitting around waiting for the other shoe to fall.


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