cook
member
Reged: 12/14/05
Posts: 1750
Loc: in my underwear
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Reminds me of the blonde at discount auto parts,asking the cashier for a 710 cap.The wise older man retrieved an OIL cap and turned it upside down to show her.
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SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7976
Loc: Mid Mo
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A blonde heard that baths in milk would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk.
When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons.
So he knocked on the door to clarify the point.
The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note asking me to leave 25 gallons of milk.
Did you mean 2.5 gallons?"
The blonde said, "No, I want 25 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath so I can look young and beautiful again."
The milkman asked, "Do you want it pasteurized?"
The blonde said, "No, just up to my tits ...
I can splash it on my eyes if I need to!"
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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
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SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7976
Loc: Mid Mo
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She's single... She's shapely ...She's beautiful... She's blonde and she lives right across the street. I can see her place from my kitchen window.
I watched as she got home from work this evening. I was surprised when she walked across the street, up my driveway and knocked on the door.
I opened the door, she looked at me and said, "I just got home, and I have this strong urge to have a good time, dance, get drunk, and have sex tonight. Are you doing anything?"
I quickly replied, "Nope, I'm free!"
"Great," she said. "Can you watch my dog?"
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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
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SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7976
Loc: Mid Mo
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A blonde was so upset about everyone always making fun of her being blonde that she decided to hang herself.
A little while later, a couple of guys walk by and see her hanging by her wrists.
“What are you doing?” They ask her.
“I’m hanging myself.” She said.
The men were confused. Then one of them said, “If you’re trying to hang yourself, you’re supposed to put the rope around your neck.
“Duh,” she said. “I tried that and I couldn’t breath.”
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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
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SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7976
Loc: Mid Mo
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Hear about the blonde who got an AM radio?
Took her three weeks to figure out she could play it at night.
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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
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Mel
member
Reged: 12/14/05
Posts: 6896
Loc: Excelsior Springs, MO
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And another week to explain it to Swamp Fox.  
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Member DU, Delta
Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names - John Kennedy
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SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7976
Loc: Mid Mo
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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
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