Cafeoutdoors.com: Rodney D. would have liked these...

Let Me Tell You About My Doctor

He is very good.

If you tell him you want a second opinion, he will go out and come in again.

He treated one woman for jaundice for three years, before he realized she was Chinese.

Another time he gave a patient six months to live. At the end of the six months, the patient still hadn't paid his bill, so the doctor gave him another six months.

While he was talking to me his nurse came in and said, "Doctor, there is a man here who thinks he is invisible."
The doctor said, "Tell him I can't see him."

Another time a man came running in the office and yelled, "Doctor, my son just swallowed a roll of film."
The doctor calmly replied, "Let's just wait and see what develops."

One patient came in and said, "Doctor, I have a serious memory problem."
The doctor asked, "When did it start?"
The man replied, "When did what start?"

I remember one time I told my doctor I had a ringing in my ears.
His advised: "Don't answer it."

My doctor has his share of nut cases. One said to him, "Doctor, I think I'm a bell." The doctor gave him some pills and said, "Here, take these. If they don't work, give me a ring."

Another guy told the doctor that he thought he was a deck of cards.
The doctor simply said, "Go sit over there. I'll deal with you later."

When I told my doctor I broke my leg in two places, he told me to stop going to those two places.

Doctors can be so frustrating. I waited six weeks for an appointment and he said, "I wish you had come to me sooner."

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Member DU, Delta

Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names - John Kennedy