**RETIREES**

*And they ask me why I like retirement. . .?*

*Question: How many days in a week?
Answer: 6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday.*

*Question: When is a retiree's bed time?
Answer: Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

Question: How many retirees are needed to change a l ight bulb?
Answer: Only one, but it might take all day.*

*Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer: There is not enough time to get everything done.*

*Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
Answer: The term comes with a 10% percent discount.*

*Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer: Tied shoes.*

*Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer: They are the only ones who have the time.*

*Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer: NUTS!*

*Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer: They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.*

*Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer: Normal.*

**Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?***
**Answers: The never ending coffee break.***

*Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer: If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.*

*Question: Why does a retiree often say he does not miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
Answer: He is too polite to tell the whole truth.*