A small zoo in Pennsylvania had a very rare species of gorilla.

Within a few weeks the gorilla, a female, became very difficult to handle. Upon examination, the veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in season. To make matters worse, there was no male gorilla available.

Thinking about their problem, the Zoo Keeper thought of Billy Joe, a part-time worker responsible for cleaning the animal cages.
Billy Joe, like most Pennsylvanians, had little sense but possessed ample ability to satisfy a female of any species.

The Zoo Keeper thought they might have a solution.
Billy Joe was approached with a proposition. Would he be willing to mate with the gorilla for $500.00?

Billy Joe showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, he announced that he would accept their offer, but only under four conditions.

"First", Billy Joe said, "I ain't gonna kiss her on the lips."

The Keeper quickly agreed to this condition.

"Second", he said, "You can't never tell no one about this."

The Keeper again readily agreed to this condition.

"Third", Billy Joe said, "I want all the children raised Lutheran."

Once again it was agreed.

"And last of all," Billy Joe stated, "You gotta give me another week to come up with the $500.00."