Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal and goes up to the first man quietly sipping his Bushmills at the bar and asks:" Do you want to go to Heaven?" The man replies:" Certainly, Father". Father Murphy says: "Then put down that drink and go stand over there against the wall".

Father Murphy approaches the second man at the bar who is also quietly sipping his whisky. He asks: "Do you want to go to Heaven?" The man replies:" Oh, Yes, Father". Father Murphy tells him:"Then put down that drink and go stand against the wall".

Father Murphy now approaches O'Toole who has been watching this whole routine. He asks O'Toole: " Do you want to go to Heaven?". O'Toole says: " NO"

Father Murphy is surprised. He says: "Don't you want to go to Heaven one day like they do?"

O'Toole says in a relieved voice: " Oh, I thought you meant right now".