I know it's an old joke but it still makes me smile...
A man goes to confession in the Catholic Church..."Father, it has been one month since my last confession. I have had sex with Nookie Green every weekfor the last month".

The priest tells the sinner, "You are forgiven Go out and say three Hail Mary's."

Soon after, another man enters the confessional. "Father, it been two months since my last confession. I have had sex with Nookie Green twice a week for the last two months."

This time the priest questions, "Who is Nookie Green?"

"A new woman in the neighborhood," the sinner replies.

"Very well, "sighs the priest. "Go and say ten Hail Mary's."

At Mass the next morning, as the priest prepares to deliver his sermon, a tall, voluptuous, drop dead gorgeous woman enters the sanctuary. The eyes of every man in the church fall upon her as she slowly sashays up the aisle and sits down right in front of the Priest! Her dress is green and very short, with matching shiny emerald green shoes.

The priest and altar boy gasp, as the woman in the matching green shoes and dress sits with her legs spread apart.

The priest turns to the altar boy and whispers, "Is that Nookie Green?

The bug-eyed altar boy can't believe his ears but replies, "No Father, I think it's just the reflection off her shoes."